FYOL Chapter 1

17 Oct

The events this past week are definitely defining my Freshman Year of Life. Between consolidating my student loans, apartment hunting and total lack of motivation to work out, I just want to either fast forward or rewind to a time when everything sales smooth.

Let’s just say that the exciting park of apartment hunting is over. I’ll spare you the details but when my mom asked me what I was doing today I replied, “laying in bed and feeling sorry for myself.”

Hah! Can you stand it? Of course I said it with a chuckle but deep down that’s exactly what I felt like doing. Horrible attitude much?

If you know me, you’d probably say that I’m a genuinely happy person, lately, not the case. I mean it’s not that I’m miserable, it’s just that awkward time where I don’t feel like I “fit” anywhere.

The family I’m living with now is beyond generous. (I’m living with a best friend, Catie’s parents. Catie doesn’t live home anymore so I’m living in her house, in her room, with her parents. Most people think it’s a little strange, but it’s not. I’ve developed a close relationship over the last four years and they knew, after I got my job in the city, that I couldn’t afford to move there immediately. So they invited me to live with them for a few months while I saved money and commuted everyday.)

I’ve lived here since I started my job, August 15, and before that I lived in a friends room, off-campus, for the summer while I applied for jobs in New York. My point is, since graduation, on May 15, I haven’t had someplace to call my own. Obviously Syracuse, where I grew up, will always be my home, but for the past five months, I’ve been squatting and I’m anxious for it to end; I want my own place surrounded by my own stuff.

Aside from that, I have the stress of student loans. It took me three hours last week but I figured everything out and start paying them back on November 4. Only a few years ago I was saying things like, “I’ll get just get loans for this and loans for that,” well Shan, loans don’t pay themselves back.

It’s interesting how people throughout your life try to teach you things that would be so beneficial for you at that moment, but you end up applying what you learned later, when you really need it. A basic example is reading. Since sophomore year Argumentation and Persuasion writing class, my professor always harped on us to read. Read books, newspapers, articles, industry publications, etc. Of course then I’d read the cover stories of the NY Times and call it a day. Now, I find myself reading so much more because of the content related to my job, or interesting op-ed articles on social media, or this piece from Fast Company about our generation. You get the idea.

Or saving money. My motto senior year was, “You can’t put a price on a good time.” Ask my roommates. If someone wanted to go out, go to a concert, anything involving fun that cost money, my answer was yes. Why? Because I didn’t put a price on a good time. I was working 20+ hours a week making decent money for a college student and was fortunate to get a relatively substantial pay check every two weeks. Granted I did have some awesome times, but could I have been a bit more responsible? Of course. Did I really need to buy everyone a beer when we went out? No. Did I need to buy four dresses for graduation because I couldn’t decide which one to wear? Nada.

Now, I think of price before I even consider a good time. I guess you live and learn.

I went to Wal-Mart today to buy some groceries and picked up the new Darius Rucker CD. For those of you who, might I say, unfortunately, don’t know who he is, he’s Hootie from Hootie and the Blowfish and is now a country music star. I actually had one of the Top 5 most fun nights of my life at his concert. Long story short, I brought a tambourine, walked to the front of the stage, began playing during Hold My Hand, he called me out and gave me a tambourine solo, he signed it at the end, went to his tour bus, band members signed it, and when Darius came out, he personally came up to me, took my tambourine out of my hand, signed it and said, “That was awesome.”


It happened.

Take a moment.

So I pop in my new CD in the car and the first songs chorus is:

Every stoplight I didn’t make
Every chance I did or I didn’t take
All the nights I went too far
All the girls that broke my heart
All the doors that I had to close
All the things I knew but I didn’t know
Thank God for all I missed
Cause it led me here to this

I got chills, and then listened to it 3x in a row. The song is called This and I strongly suggest you listen to it, STAT.


Band ^


Darius ^


Friends ^


Him signing it ^


My solo ^




1) I will brag about this story till the day I die

2) That picture is on my desk at work


4 Responses to “FYOL Chapter 1”

  1. leashieloo October 18, 2010 at 10:09 am #

    When I was in college, I would take out a bigger loan thinking, “Let my future self worry about it, tomorrow is promised to no one. I should have fun while I can.” Needless to say, present me is a little peeved with past me. My student loans aren’t as outrageous as some peoples but I’d rather have less debt!

  2. allieksmith October 18, 2010 at 2:37 pm #

    Sorry about your loans :/ Awesome pictures though 🙂

  3. Leanna October 19, 2010 at 12:16 am #

    You’ve convinced me…I seriously need to get that album.

    And it’ll work out! I’m keeping my fingers crossed that the open house goes well.

  4. Shannon [Tropical Eats] October 19, 2010 at 8:25 pm #

    all i gotta say is holy crap. Darius Rucker is amazing! Was contemplating buying his cd tonight.. but then i realized i haven’t bought a real cd in about 5 years.

    totally feel ya on the $ situation girly! im a boomarang child.. if only life didnt revolve around money UGH!!

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